Weather in Japan
Weather in Japan:Being in Japan in Winter Means Seeing your breath when you get up in the morning. Cracking the ice so the tidy bowl man isn't stranded, unless a mini-Canadian ice breaker arrives before you. I don`t know how they get in the toilet? I don`t even know why there is a mini-tidy bowl man there? Maybe I gotta cut back on the cold medicines! The cockroaches no longer try to enter your apartment, they did survive the dinosaurs and they aren't that stupid, it's warmer outside! But the few cockroaches that are stuck in my kitchen,....THEY ARE MINE! This is payback for summertime baby! The good thing in the winter is when you discover a large Japanese cockroach they can`t move quickly anymore! They are like Captain Kirk in Star Trek when they hear you come into the kitchen: "MUST...Get...un....der sink,,....Can`t move, legs stuck to linoleum...., MUST ...Get Un..der...Sink." SPRAy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! "I`m Melting!" THWACK! Goes the Daily Yomiuri! Weather in Japan - Japanese Winter I love winter! I love waking up to the smell of RAID in the morning!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ....mmmmh.....Condensation inside your windows. Mold growing slowly and fermenting.....makes a nice alcoholic drink I am told. I love realizing there's a business opportunity! You could be the first to introduce Japanese to insulation! Trying to locate thermal underwear stores on the internet. Having practiced your "flying V" movement in the fall, you are able to successfully ward off friend and foe alike, while running like a mad man for the kotatsu. Incidentally, the "flying V" was perfected by my brother Wayne, and works well for warding off obatalian on the crowded trains. He perfected this martial arts move, while living in Meguro ku. Ooh I love the smell of kerosene in the morning. Geriatric former NHLers ply their trade with teams like the Nippon Ham Cranes and the Kokudo Bunnies. I wanna see Gretzky in a Ham uniform! Maybe he's more of a bunny though? Whaddya think? Drinking an ethyl alcohol effluent the Japanese fondly call, "sake." (When we are behind on our house payments, I run my car on it). You can use it to remove those tough to get rid of stains too. The annual debate occurs between foreigners: "It's an alcoholic beverage!" "No, it's a floor cleaner!" "It`s an alcoholic beverage!" "No it`s a floor cleaner!" Announcer: "Hey you two, you`re both right! It's an alcoholic beverage and a floor cleaner." The Ainu hoping to avoid the worst of it, leave on their annual migration to Vancouver. Japanese high school girls pack away their crotch level skirts and exchange them for thigh level. Damn! God I miss summer! Freezing your kintama off everytime you go to the bathroom! (That is if you have kintama). Don't know what they are? Go ask your Japanese friend. Starting an intimate relationship with Phyllis or Bert the English teacher just to stay warm. God I'm cold!--Kevin Burns (Excuse me, I gotta go turn up my last name, it's freezing in here!) From weather in Japan to humor about Japan
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